Q2 Quotes Database
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Themes
Updates
3/5/2009 - Quotes removed
2 quotes have been removed from the database.
7/8/2007 - Internal optimisation
The codebase has been optimised to speed up site access, and to make scripted access to this site simpler.
13/7/2007 - Some irrelevant quotes removed
20-30 quotes that relate to programming and operating systems have been removed because they probably aren't relevant to most people.
6/7/2007 - Minor correction
A minor correction has been made to the quotes database.
29/6/2007 - Theme bug fixed
A minor bug in the One theme has been fixed.
21/6/2007 - 1000 new quotes
1000+ new quotes have been added to the Q2 Quotes Database.
18/6/2007 - 900 new quotes, tweaks to site
900+ new quotes have been added to the Q2 Quotes Database. The site design and backend have been tweaked too.
11/6/2007 - Search box added
A search box has been added to each page if you're using the Simple or Bash.org themes. If you're using the Original or Lo-Fi theme then there's a Search link at the top of each page. The search results page has had a new coat of paint too.
7/6/2007 - Theme bugfix
Another bug in the theme code has been fixed. That'll teach me to test fully ;). Everything should be just fine and dandy now!
5/6/2007 - New theme, theme bugfix
The default theme has been changed from Original to Simple'n Clean, but there was a bug in the theme code that sometimes showed the new theme only on the home page, and showing the old theme on the other pages. This has been fixed. Also, there is a fresh new theme called One! Just select "One" from the drop-down above to select the new theme.
30/5/2007 - Formatting error fixed
Spaces at the beginning and end of quotes have been removed. E.g. " blah, blah, blah " -> "blah, blah, blah". The quotes in the full text have been randomly sorted again too. Also, the random quotes generater will not add a newline to the ends of quotes anymore.
The Q2 database is a collection of over 11000 funny/proverbial quotes. More...
Here's some randomly chosen quotes from the collection:
“In order to form an immaculate member of a flock of sheep one must, above all, be a sheep.” -- attributed to Albert Einstein
Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for those who love, time is eternity. -- Henry Van Dyke
A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. -- Ben Franklin
Take your dying with some seriousness, however. Laughing on the way to your execution is not generally understood by less-advanced life-forms, and they'll call you crazy. -- Messiah's Handbook: Reminders for the Advanced Soul
“You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone.” -- Al Capone
Sometimes I do get to places just when God's ready to have somebody click the shutter. -- Ansel Adams
“That girl's so skinny, she'd have to stand up twice to make a shadow!” -- Jean Williams, about a co-worker.
“The optimist proclaims we life in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimists fears this is true.” -- James Cabel
“Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together....” -- Carl Zwanzig
“Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast the disc jockey is not allowed to talk.” -- Fran Lebowitz
Every man is as God made him, ay, and often worse. -- Miguel de Cervantes
“The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is comprehensible.” -- attributed to Albert Einstein
Each religion, by the help of more or less myth which it takes more or less seriously, proposes some method of fortifying the human soul and enabline it to make its peace with its destiny. -- George Santayana
I think it's probably a good thing to be considered stable, but with a capacity for madness. -- Wayne Coyne, The Flaming Lips
Your fortune stateth: You have an ability to sense and know higher truth.
Your fortune stateth: You are going to have a new love affair.
Evilwill always triumph over good, because it is dumb. -- Dark Helmet
“No, this trick won't work...How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as first love?” -- attributed to Albert Einstein
“One cannot make an omelette without breaking eggs -- but it is amazing how many eggs one can break without making a decent omelette.” -- Prof. Charles P. Issawi
With a rubber duck, one's never alone. -- “The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy”
Think about world peace; while you're doing that I'll be over here stealing your stuff. -- Jack Handey
Your fortune stateth: Don't relax! It's only your tension that's holding you together.
“It is much easier to be critical than to be correct.” -- Benjamin Disraeli
“If love is blind then why are we not equipped with seeing eye dogs?” -- Mary
“Patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel.” -- Samuel Johnson
Get more here! Or get quotes other ways. Or you can even view the entire collection at once here.
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